bring back the duel to the death ...

friends:

i make a modest proposal to bring civility and comportment back into politics.

i suggest that we bring back the duel to the death.  it was a cherished institution right up until the civil war, and did much to assure that those who openly engaged in public rancor with their political adversaries at least did so in all seriousness.

you may be sure that when aaron burr killed alexander hamilton, he did not do so in light jest.

just imagine if you will, a world without the braying jackasses lanny davis, james carville, susan estridge, barney frank, al franken, and a host of other loud mouthed insufferable braggarts and professional sycophants.  imagine a world with reverend wright, or jesse jackson, ... , or any number of others who are of spiteful, contemptuous and rancorous dispositions.

i assume that all such people as named above would button up their yaps were dueling back in vogue, as i am assuming that not one of them would be of sufficient mettle to actually have at it with an equally armed opponent at arms length.  nothing quite like the prospect of death to invoke a little caution in one's expression, a little civility in one's demeanor.

as to weapons, if guns were favored by the combatants, i would think that the .45 long colt in a brace of model 1873 colts at 15 paces would be sufficiently lethal to insure the death of one or more of the participants.  if people wanted to work hard enough at it to ensure a proper aesthetic, in keeping with the proper solemnity of the moment, say a duel as between franken and frank, then nothing beats the classic foil.  and, always, as in all things human, one or a society should not entirely loose it sense of humor about such things, we should always be mindful of abraham lincoln's choice of weapons when challenged to a duel by a fellow illinois militia officer, during some very obscure militia versus indians campaign.  lincoln chose rapiers, and the fight to occur on a plank slung between hogsheads, e.g., that's a big ass wooden barrel, to you.

the would be duelist thought the better of it in lincoln's case, and was consigned to a deservedly obscure place in history.

an occasional genius like hamilton was felled, but far more hot tempered big mouths like lincoln's adversary were sufficiently chastened by the chill air of morning to perhaps reconsider whether the matter at hand actually merited dying.

i can think of nothing more desirable than shutting up the caravilles and estridges of the world, and believe the duel to the death a fitting mechanism by which to do so.  what could be the downside to a fight between barney frank, and any other person on earth?

(you'll notice an implicit trust in my analysis in g_d making the proper decision, in all cases.)

john jay @ 07.06.2009

Comments

[Phil]

I'd like Barney Frank and Sarah Palin to duell. That way whoever died we'd still be ahead. In fact with any luck they'd both be killed.

[john jay]

phil:

i've not much use for barney frank, regarding him as about as worthless as tits on a boar hog.

i rather like sarah palin.

i believe that i take vigorous exception to your remarks about her. she has been a breath of fresh air in the american political scene.

i hope she garners the presidency some day, and consider it if not entirely like then at least quite possible.

so there.

john jay

p.s. i do not understand your animus to her? care to explain?

[john jay]

" ... if not entirely likely, then ... "

[Justin Credible]

I would very much like to hear from someone why Sarah Palin garners so much scorn from folks.

is it the pro-life thing? Is it her desire for energy independence, fiscal restraint, secure borders, smaller government, lower taxes, or what? just would like someone to explain it to me.

Cordially,
Justin

[john jay]

justin:

i wish that i had said it so well.

john jay

[Proof]

There's a lot of merit to that idea. I always favored a lottery for one member of Congress to be lined up against the wall and shot each term.
Anyone not willing to lay down his life for his country need not apply!

Dueling, however gives each a sporting chance and would permeate society as a whole!

[john jay]

proof:

laughing. there are 435 of 'em in the house, and, let me see, 57 x's 2 per each of the o.i.c. states, for 539.

why not 10 a year? not a bad start.

john jay

[Robert]

Sarah Palin, Clarence Thomas, Miguel Estrada, and others like them serve as living proof that supposedly "oppressed minorities" do not need the pompous "rick" politicians to get a fair shake in this society and be able to compete with anyone, completely contrary to the Marxist idiot-ology they have swallowed hook, line, and sinker that says everyone who isn't a white male needs the aid of government officials and is helpless without it, and that they darn well better be grateful for that "help", or else. As those pompous "rick" politicians also tend to be elitists who attended the Ivy League universities and were taught that they are the best and brightest, they probably also hate seeing living proof of any non-white, non-Ivy Leaguer, or woman living a better, more successful life than themselves.

As for duels, I remember a historian on, I believe, the History channel saying that the combatants in duels would usually aim for a non-lethal spot on the opponent, and that duels usually did not result in the death of one of the duellers. Some of the duellers were evidently angry enough with their opponents to shoot to kill, however. I agree it would bring back some civility, or else those who insist on being a-holes would quickly find themselves getting killed off.

[JorgXMcKie]

You've got the 'Lincoln duel' all wrong. It was huge cavalry sabers in an enclosed space with a board dividing them.
See: http://www.failedsuccess.com/index.php?/weblog/comments/abraham_lincoln_duel/

As a native Illinoisan born on Feb 12 (Lincoln's birthday), I've read quite a bit about him. His 'duel' was an interesting bit of history mostly forgotten until a few years ago.

[john jay]

jorgxmckie:

my memory is hardly infallible, but my version of the duel is based on carl sandburg's biography of lincoln, which i read in the library of eastern oregon state college, la grande, oregon many years ago.

i have read other accounts, and the board on the barrels has been repeated.

i will look to your link, however, as it should make interesting reading, as does almost everything pertaining to mr. lincoln.

at any rate, the person who challenged lincoln wanted nothing to do with a very long weapon at the end of those very long arms attached to the very long frame. laughing.

as mr. lincoln no doubt fully well intended.

reminds me of a movie, perhaps better forgotten, where the gap toothed english comedian, terry thomas i believe, responded to a challenge to a duel by requesting "balloons and blunderbusses" for weapons.

john jay

p.s. that winter in the easter oregon college library i read all the volumes of sandburg's biography, including the volume of the attached letters of lincoln.

i started out, mostly interested in staying warm, as the rented rooms i stayed in that winter had no heat, nor electricity, except hot water to the bath tub and one outlet near where i spread a sleeping bag and blankets on the floor. i slept in wool socks and a wool watch cap and insulated underwear, and by the time i toweled from bathing, i was red like a lobster from the cold.

nary a single cold that winter. but, i digress.--

i soon became captivated by sandburg, his prose perhaps better than his poetry, ... , or, at least, not a whole lot different from it. it was a lovely read, ... .

to this day, i regard lincoln perhaps the most human & flawed & tragic of all americans, and the greatest public man that we have ever produced.

john jay

p.s. thank you for your comment. always good to continue being educated.

please, come back and read some more, if you are so inclined, and please, more comments.

[john jay]

jorgxmckie:

i think my memory has to give way to the scholarship and research of your link.

i like my story better. it is more succinct.

but, it would appear the facts are facts and that corrobaration is corrobaration, so i believe that you carry the day.

it is a delightful story, your version, and i had to chuckle and marvel at it several times.

john jay